I graduated in college just this June. I took up Bachelor of Arts in Journalism. I really can’t still believe that I was able to finish college, for we all know how rough this journey could be. Well, just like any other college students here, I had experienced so many failures throughout my four fucking years in college, but, let’s not get into so much details with that. I am writing this blog to tell everyone what happened to me after graduation. It is a sort of expectation versus reality. This could also be a warning to seniors so that they would know what they should do or what should they not do after school.
Before graduation, just like anybody, we are all excited to go to the outside world. The fact that we will be able to earn money for ourselves excites us so much. Well, me too. I earned my Bachelor’s degree at the age of 19, and yes, I am a degree holder at a very young age. But, is that an advantage? In my case, no, it is not. A month before our graduation day, I already started passing resumé to several companies. Of course, my main target is to enter the media industry, specifically, the main stream media. But the thing is, two months had passed, and the day of our graduation came, but I still have no job waiting for me. (I received a call from a network movie production team but their offer is too low so, I declined the offer.) I graduated on June 14, the other day; I have decided to try my luck to other companies and other fields. On that same day, I received a text message from a Diagnostic Company inviting me for an interview. The next day, I went to their office, I passed the exams and interviews and to sum it up, I accepted their offer and started to work immediately. That was my very first real job. That day, I feel so lucky that I was able to get a job just a day after graduation. You know, the fact that the economy is not doing well and there is a huge percentage of unemployment in this country.
The struggle begins after I started working on my first job. I was shook with all the adult stuff I had to deal with. You know, I am only 19 and yet I am dealing with people a lot older than me. The teenage to adulthood transition wasn’t easy for me. I feel so immature, fragile and sensitive, but overnight, I have to change it, which is I can’t afford to do. I never had a part time job. I never had an idea what could it be like to enter the real world. And that puts my life into a big mess. I cannot stop thinking that maybe this job is really not meant for me; maybe I am taking the wrong path. I cannot stop questioning myself, “What the fuck are you doing in this field? You are a Journalist.” With all those shitty thoughts, I have decided to quit.
For the second time around, I decided to try my luck in the media industry. I received an offer from a network company, I passed the exams and the interview. They say they will endorse me to the Department Head but, I received no feedback after that day. I tried calling them but they’re not answering. Yes, I still wonder why they did that until now. Maybe I am not that competent enough for them. But, I didn’t give up, I went to almost all network and radio company but for the second time around also, I failed. That was the most frustrating days of my life. I have no money, I have no job and I have nothing. It is so tiring answering questions like, “Why are you here at home? Don’t you have work today?” “Why did you quit?” “What the hell are you doing?”
After two months, I ended up applying to a BPO company. I am about to start a new job when a lot of realizations came. The thing is, I immediately call my previous supervisor, I packed my things and go back to my hometown to tell my family that I am going back to the Diagnostics Company. Why? Because I realized that God has prepared the best for me but I keep on questionning his plan, I keep on wanting more, and I keep on wondering those shit “what ifs” in life. I realized that regrets and ‘what ifs’ are not important, what matters is the present or the so called ‘what is’. I realized that he already gave the answer to my prayer. He already gave me the best career for me. He puts me already on the right path but it is me who had decided to turn my back and take the other path because I don’t think I trust God’s plan that time; I doubted him. And that is the biggest mistake I’ve ever did.
Those passed two months that I am jobless I had realized too many things. First, do not rush in life. We are not in a race that the first person who achieves something gets to win. Life isn’t competition. Take your time. Second, do not question God’s plan for you. Everything happens for a reason. Third, embrace changes. And lastly, have courage.
Maybe the past months are the shittiest days of my life but those are the days I had the most significant learning ever. Now, I feel so much better and I want to serve this company for good.